Dr Michelle Mars - Sexual fitness - 8 May
In this segment we will talk about the what, when, why and how
of (s)exercise providing viewers with a workout plan to improve
their sexual fitness.
Sex is good but better sex is better. Good sex is about technique,
love and intimacy. Our brains are our biggest sex organs but our
bodies carry out our sexual desires. A body that is fit for sex is
better able to accomplish our sexual wishes.
Building up strength, flexibility and rhythm in your sexual centre
means better sex at the same time as it improves your general
health and wellbeing.
Being fit for better sex does require a healthy body and good
amount of general fitness but it also requires some attention to
the sex muscles and the other muscles that we use to achieve
orgasm. Toning these muscles improves the length and strength of
orgasms.
You can be in very good condition physically for many things,
sport, dancing, skiing, tramping and so on but that doesn't mean
your body is fit for sex. We receive training for sport and
recreation from an early age. Physical exercise is compulsory in
schools and we get a lot a coaching for things like rugby and
netball. Particular sports and recreational pursuits require us to
concentrate on particular parts of our bodies and we get special
exercises and training from more experienced players. But when it
comes to sex silence reigns.
It is socially acceptable to talk about intimacy and love and
sexual health, so why are the physical aspects of sexual encounters
such a secret? Because it's about parts of the body that we
consider private, like the genitals, or dirty like the anus. Also
because many adults don't know very much about their sexual fitness
anatomy and many adults are embarrassed to talk about what goes on
'down there'.
'Down there', where the sexual organs sit is a very important part
of the body. It's the core or sexual centre of the body. It's
particularly important to pay attention to this part of the body
after child birth and for women and men as we start to age. The
rest of the organs that drive the body are located directly on top
of our sexual organs and as we begin to age we notice changes with
things like urination, menstruation, strength of erection and so
on.
It is very important to build up strength, flexibility and rhythm
in your sexual centre. Not only does it improve your capacity to
achieve sexual pleasure it is also incredibly good for your overall
health and wellbeing.
You can have a strong tummy and great abs but that still doesn't
mean you are fit for sex. Building up sexual strength requires
dedicated practice just like any other kind of fitness. At
antenatal classes women get told to strengthen their pelvic floor
muscles and men are beginning to become aware that they need to
keep an eye their prostates as they age. But I think the
message doesn't really get through and most of us will do a token
number of meagre repetitions if we happen to think of
it.
What is really required, for both women and men, if you want to
improve urinary continence, have great sex, keep your prostate
fit, healthy and disease free, gain control over ejaculation
and generally improve your health and wellbeing is to put some
effort and energy in like you would on the sports field.
It's not about 10 or 20 or 30 measly squeezes. It's about working
out. First you have to locate your pelvic floor muscles around your
perineum and vagina. They are the ones we use to begin and end
urination so the best place to find them is on the toilet. Try
stopping and starting urination until you get the hang of where
they are and then once you have them it's time to give them a work
out. Try squeezing them fast and slow. Experts can differentiate up
to 9 different levels of constriction from soft to weak. Most fit
and healthy people should be able to feel at least two.
The muscles around the vagina, perineum and anus all need exercise.
Ideally you should be able to differentiate between your pelvic
floor muscles located toward the front of your body and the
sphincter muscles around your anus. But if you can't feel the
difference yet it doesn't matter because all the muscles in this
part of the body are very close to one another and squeezing the
perineum, anus and vagina (if you have one) all at the
same time gives your whole sexual centre a really good work
out.
Flexibility is also important. It is not about contortionism or
tying yourself in knots Karma Sutra style. It's about very subtle
movements in the area around the hips and tail bone. Because we
spend a lot of time sitting down on chairs our hips and tailbones
tend to become fixed and immovable and this limits the flexibility.
Flexibility is very important for good sex.
Think about sexy dances and they all involve a little hip movement.
There is a big muscle in humans called the Psoas (pronounced
"so-az") muscle. In beef it's the tenderloin and in humans it is
also quite large around 12 inches. The psoas muscle starts around
the bottom of the spine and winds down and right around inserting
into the top of the leg. It's the source of a lot of back
pain and keeping it strong and flexible is really important for
good sex. An easy way to begin get things moving again here is to
put on some sexy music and have a little dance or to make a motion
like you were hula hooping or hula dancing. You can also try moving
your hips in a figure of 8. Make sure that your tail bone is tucked
under and your bottom isn't sticking out.
Rhythmic music gets us going. It's great for exercise and great for
sex. Sex is all about rhythm and you can get better at feeling the
rhythm of sex by practicing while you do your pelvic floor
exercises. Contract the anus and the perineum and vagina in
rhythmic sets of 9. Try combinations of different rhythms 9 fast 9
slow, 9 strong 9 gentle or 3 strong, 3 soft, 3 strong and so on.
Have fun play around.
Sex is good for you and like anything if you practice you will gain
more strength, control, and flexibility and importantly more
control over your own sexual pleasure, you will get better at sex
and increase your sexual and overall wellbeing. The rest of your
body sits on top of your sexual centre and if this is healthy, pert
and in good shape the rest of your body will benefit.
