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Trelise Cooper - Source: ONE News -
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Rugby World Cup Ambassador. It feels a little bit like they're
palming off that title to any old schmo these days, I count at
least twenty two.
Mind you, now that I think about it, I've definitely heard that
most cringe-worthy of lines "A nation of four million ambassadors"
on at least a couple of occasions.
Anyway, Len Brown's got in on the ambassadorial action, excitedly
naming 15 Aucklanders as the city's ambassadors for the Rugby World
Cup. It's a motley pod of achievers, faces and names. But you know
what, there might be the bones of a half decent team.
Fullback: Sir John Walker (Captain)
Gold Medallist Runner. Heart like an ox. And what City Councillors
don't have vision?
Wing: Grant Dalton
Experienced in touring. Good in wet weather.
Wing: Nigel Morrison
Who? The opposition tacticians will be stumped.
Centre: Trelise Cooper
Ma'a Nonu gets away with eye liner, it shouldn't be too much of a
push to add platform heels, lipstick and some nice
foundation.
Second Five: J. Williams
Silky moves. Pretty face. Probably the one the cameras will focus
on when they sing the national anthem.
First Five: Oscar Kightley
He doesn't just read the play, he writes it.
Halfback: John Hart
An experienced rugby head, he's learnt the hard way never to
underestimate the French.
Number Eight: Sir Wilson Whineray
IRB Hall of Famer. One of the World's greatest ever loose-head
props, but at 75 the shoulders aren't what they once were. There's
nothing funny about an All Black legend with a dislocated
limb.
Blinside Flanker: Michael Barnett
As always the default position for people who don't really fit in
anywhere else.
Openside Flanker: Ruben Wiki
Durable. Athletic. Quick at the break down. A star performer.
Lock: Bernice Mene.
Tall and good at catching.
Lock: Carol Hirschfield
Almost as tall as Bernice.
Loosehead Prop: Kerre Woodham
Her lineout calls are crisp and audible. And she's a marathon
runner these days so she shouldn't need a sub.
Hooker: Simon Gault.
Like all good chefs he's just a little bit plump.
Tighthead Prop: Julie Christie
Utterly ferocious. Lacks the physical presence of an Olo Brown or
Carl Hayman but she rules the dirtiest business of them all (TV not
rugby).
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