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International Comedy Festival

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9 questions for Carey Marx

1) How did you get the name of your show this year?
I took my name, Carey, and added, ness. My intention was to capture the essence of me. But, because I did not know what that meant, I wrote about something else.

2) Tell us the best punchline from the show
Goats arent like that!

3) Whats been your best heckle?
I would like to take this opportunity to explode the myth of the great heckle. This is the reality:

For the last twelve years I have performed to an average 260 audiences a year, making a total of 3120 live audiences. At an average of 200 people in an audience this comes to 624,000 people.

Some of those people have shouted reasonable heckles that were amusing in the moment. But not one of them has shouted a particularly clever or enduringly funny heckle. I have great respect for my audiences, but hecklers are a special breed who need to try harder. Most of them were spoiled as children. I have just run this opinion by some other comics, and between us we could only recount five reasonably good heckles out of all the gigs we have ever witnessed or heard about.

This does not mean there have not been amusing audience-moments. Last week I told a joke about a recently dead celebrity and then jumped to a joke on masturbation and a drunk in the audience shouted, Too soon. But, it was only his hapless timing that made it funny.

4) What was your response?
I apologised to him for his loss.

5) Whats the craziest thing youve ever bought on TradeMe?
I dont know what TradeMe is but I assume its like Ebay. I have never bought anything crazy on Ebay although I have just put in a bid for Iceland and a few other bankrupt countries.

6) Aside from yourself, who would you kill to see at this years festival and why?
I do not know which other performers are there. I have the gala list here and note that Glenn Wool is on it. I would not kill to see anyone on because mostly they are friends who would let me in anyway and Id seriously regret my murder. Glenn is a great writer and performer. I would not kill to see him but I would punch an orphan quite hard.

7) What was the last film you watched?
Slumdog Millionaire, which makes Oliver Twist look like a big girls blouse who sings soppy songs. The film made me want to live in a slum. Running around corners yelling. Hiding places. Great fun. Thanks to global warming, shrinking shore lines and overpopulation, soon we will all live that way and they will remake the film about a kid from the slum who wins a place in a slightly better slum.

8) What was the one question you were glad you werent asked on this questionnaire?
What are your banking pin numbers? Because I would have told you. But, its too late now.

9) Whats the one question we should have asked?
What are your banking pin numbers?